3 weeks ago 3 weeks ago

Woman Decides Enough Is Enough, Stops Being A Mom To Her Husband: “Finally Snapped”

Traditional gender roles often portray women as the primary nurturers. And based on a belief many consider outdated, wives are expected to take care of their husbands, who, in turn, are expected to provide for the family.

Such arrangements can be problematic, especially when the woman begins to coddle her man to the point where he relies on her for literally everything. It’s the exact story you’re about to read, where the lady described her spouse as a “preschooler who suddenly stops because he sees an interesting rock.”

Scroll through to read the entire text and see how this unfolded.

Women are known to be the nurturers of the family

Woman focused on planning and writing in a notebook, illustrating change in how she treats her husband with chaos ensuing.

Image credits: Karolina Grabowska / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

But between this couple, the wife realized she had been coddling her husband

Text excerpt discussing a woman realizing she was momming her husband and addressing gendered expectations in marriage dynamics.

Text excerpt discussing a woman reflecting on unintentionally becoming the planner in her relationship, relating to chaos.

Woman managing chaos as she stops treating her husband like a kid, showing frustration and confusion in a home setting.

Alt text: Woman stops treating husband like a kid, leading to unexpected chaos during their planned visit and spontaneous detours.

Text excerpt showing a woman stops treating her husband like a kid causing chaos and frustration due to lateness.

Woman and husband stand apart with arms crossed in kitchen, showing tension after she stops treating him like a kid.

Image credits: cookie_studio / freepik (not the actual photo)

She shared exact instances when her man couldn’t seem to function without her doing the most basic things for him

Text excerpt showing a woman stops treating her husband like a kid causing confusion during a pub pickup.

Woman stops treating husband like a kid, frustration grows as he drags feet and gets distracted during plans.

Text excerpt showing a woman stating she stopped managing her husband’s punctuality or organizing tasks for him.

Text excerpt about a woman who stops treating her husband like a kid, leading to him being late and chaos ensuing.

Woman stops treating her husband like a kid, feeling stressed and overwhelmed while holding her temples indoors.

Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)

The woman finally snapped and saw the cracks in their relationship

Text on a white background about stepping back and realizing invisible tasks and treating husband with momming habits due to gender roles.

Text showing a woman expressing frustration as she stops treating her husband like a kid, urging him to act like an adult.

Image credits: anon

Many who allow themselves to be “mothered” by their wives are rooted in their learned roles

There is no question that the husband should man up and carry his end of the couch, so to speak. His wife, after all, is not his mother or caretaker, and continuing the cycle would only do more harm to their relationship.

However, part of his behavior is also due to the learned roles between men and women. As psychotherapist William Berry explains, it all goes back to the mother-child dynamic, in which the mother takes on the day-to-day caregiving responsibilities, such as making doctor appointments, cooking, and checking to ensure everything is running smoothly.

Fathers, on the other hand, are associated with play. And as Berry noted, it’s a trait he may embody as he enters relationships with women. According to him, the same mother-child dynamic may repeat, even through marriage.

“(Wives) may encourage less play (hanging out with friends, heavy drinking) and behave in a more grown-up fashion,” Berry wrote, adding that many men may express discontent over how their significant others “had fun” before marriage, then suddenly took on the adult role after tying the knot.

Berry says throwing blame may not help, as he encourages focusing on having a clear understanding of the roots of their behaviors, then addressing them with compassion and dialogue. Mom blogger Mellissa Edgington shared a similar sentiment, along with actionable tips to address such a problem.

“Tell him that you are worried that he feels you treat him like a child, and that’s the very last way you want him to feel because you respect and honor him as the love of your life,” she wrote.

However, the woman had grown fed up with her husband’s refusal to “adult up,” which is understandable. At that point, her other option was to put her foot down and set boundaries, which is another way to handle the situation.