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Unless you’re not a big believer in monogamy, entering an open relationship would be playing with fire. There’s a chance for you to enjoy it with zero doubts, but there’s also the possibility of it being the worst decision you will ever make. 

For this man, it was the latter. After his girlfriend agreed to his request for a polyamorous arrangement, he suddenly wanted to take it back after things didn’t go as he expected. Unfortunately, his partner already begun enjoying her new life and refused. 

He had since lashed out, making the woman feel like she was too harsh for turning him down. 

Entering an open relationship is a risk

Young man discussing open relationship with upset younger coworker showing disinterest during a tense conversation.

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A man failed to realize this when he broached the idea to his girlfriend, who agreed

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Text on a white background: About 6 months ago he brought up the idea of opening the relationship to date younger coworker.

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Text excerpt about a man’s plan to open relationship to date younger coworker, which backfires when she is uninterested.

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He wanted to make the relationship exclusive again, which the woman refused to agree with

Man’s plan to open relationship to date younger coworker backfires as she shows no interest in him.

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It takes a lot of selflessness for an open relationship to work

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Relationships are always a two-way street. That also applies when you decide to open it up and date around. 

According to licensed therapist and author John Kim, it takes more than just acceptance to make a polyamorous relationship work. 

“Both parties must (also) encourage their partners to have new experiences with others,” Kim wrote in an article for Psychology Today. “You don’t need to know the details, but you have to get to a place where you want your partner to explore their sexuality with others.”

Some studies report that open relationships (particularly marriages) have a 92% failure rate. While it did not mention the reasons for such a high number, Kim went on to explain that most people compare notes with their partners about the number of people they’ve been with. 

“Open relationships are not about playing the field or how many people you can get into your rotation,” he stated, adding that honesty with one another is also important to make such an arrangement work without problems. 

This is what seemed to have happened with the woman’s boyfriend. He could not handle the idea that his partner was more successful with dating other people. It may have hurt his ego more than it did when his plan to pursue a coworker failed. 

Unless their relationship somehow strengthens, things will likely be more chaotic between the woman and her partner. There was nothing wrong with not wanting to resume their relationship, since it was the man who wanted to open it in the first place. 

People in the comments sided with the woman and had harsh words for her partner

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Man’s plan to open relationship to date younger coworker backfires as she shows no interest in him.

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Commenter warning about risks of opening a relationship, mentioning breakups and regret when plans to date younger coworker backfire.

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