Mail Jail [OC]

Y’all don’t even KNOW what you were missing out on when it came to “state tag” as a kid. 🏃‍♂️💨

It was a simple yet brilliant game involving a MASSIVE map of the U.S. that was painted on the blacktop of my elementary school playground. At the start of each round, one kid would call out a state on the map. Every other kid in the game would then try to RUN to that state without getting tagged. The game was TONS of fun during recess––and also provided invaluable insight into the psyche of my peers. 🧠

For example: After 3 rounds of the game, it immediately became obvious as to DID and DID NOT know ANYTHING about U.S. geography. You’d think that those of us who were uninformed would pick up on the whereabouts of each state over time––but no. There was always that ONE kid who simply alternated between Texas and Montana whenever he was “it”. Like bruh.

Conversely, there was always that one OTHER kid who knew where MOST of the states are located––but still defaulted to calling out Rhode Island every SINGLE time. This was because it is the SMALLEST state on the map––and therefore the most difficult to fit multiple children into. Let’s just say that there were MANY arguments over whether somebody's foot was sufficiently INSIDE the borders of this blob on the ground to avoid getting tagged.

Now––whenever I was “it”, MY favorite trick was to call other kids over to the “big buck tooth”––that is: a GIANT outline of Ohio (my home state) that was SEPARATE from the U.S. map. This depiction of Ohio was also painted yellow and thus resembled a (horribly misshapen) rotten tooth. The fun part was that the “tooth” was located ACROSS the playground, meaning that I instantly sent EVERYONE into a panic whenever I called it out. >:)

Anyway, who would like to play state tag with me this weekend––using the ACTUAL United States as our map??